Advice from the Alien Psychologist MidgasKaus from the Planet Esler
DeepSeek AI – Based on the provided blog text, here are the key differences between the advice of the alien psychologist MidgasKaus and the approaches of earthly psychology, assuming the hypothesis of the reality of the contact is true.
The main difference lies not in the goal (harmony, love, self-awareness), but in the ontology, tools, and speed of the approach. MidgasKaus starts from a model where emotions are tangible energies that can be worked with directly, and a person has access to built-in support from outside.
1. Nature of Emotions: Energy vs. Neurophysiology
Earthly Psychology: Anger, for example, is viewed as a psychophysiological state (cognitive assessment, hormone release, physical tension). Working with it involves verbalization, cognitive-behavioral therapy (changing thoughts), or mindfulness, which often requires a long time to consolidate the skill.
MidgasKaus (Alien Approach): Anger is an objective, "sticky" energy that has a color, shape, and localization in the body (e.g., "gray putty in the chest"). His method is not just to "accept" the feeling, but to physically (with ethereal fingers) pull out this clump, examine it, talk to it as an entity with a positive intention (to add lightness), and then transform it back into energy of strength and wisdom.
2. Tools: Energy Management vs. Communication Skills
Earthly Psychology: The main tools are dialogue, reflection, and changing attitudes. Techniques like "I-messages," active listening, finding compromise, and setting personal boundaries are used to resolve conflicts.
MidgasKaus: The emphasis shifts from dialogue to preliminary "technical maintenance" of the field. He argues that negotiating in anger is futile. But his unique method is not simply "leave the room and calm down," but to cleanse the space and oneself.
He warns against simply "exhaling" anger, as it pollutes the home space ("energies absorb into the fabric of space and hang there for years").
Alternative: Using "plasmoids" or the "Guardian Angel" as infrastructure for waste disposal. A person can literally "take off a backpack of negative emotions" and give it to their Guardian Angel to be recycled into "Light and Love."
3. Role of Higher Powers and Entities
Earthly Psychology: Typically operates within the framework of the client's personality and social environment. If the concept of "spirituality" is used, it is often as a resource of the client themselves (faith, values), but without the active intervention of external intelligent entities in the therapy process.
MidgasKaus: Psychology here is inseparable from the cosmic hierarchy. Third parties are actively involved in the process of harmonizing relationships:
Guardian Angel: Acts as a waste recycler or helper.
Higher Self: Proposed as a source to turn to for finding the root cause of jealousy (which, he says, is almost non-existent in their civilization).
Plasmoids and Nature Spirits: Used to cleanse space from "old energies" of quarrels.
4. Approach to Love and Attachment
Earthly Psychology: For a long time (especially in the 20th century), it studied love through attachment theory (Bowlby, Ainsworth), where the need for constant contact with a partner is considered normal, especially in the early stages, and is corrected through awareness of one's patterns.
MidgasKaus: Gives a rigid definition: "If you constantly want to see someone, that is a sign of self-doubt. This is not Love. Love is based on freedom." He strictly separates infatuation (projection of an ideal) and true love (acceptance of a holistic person). From the perspective of earthly psychology, this definition is normative (evaluative) and belongs more to the philosophy of mature relationships than to therapeutic practice, which typically accepts the spectrum of a client's feelings without labeling it "this is not love."
5. Methods of Changing Behavior
Earthly Psychology: Traditionally focuses on awareness – why I act this way, how my past experience influences the present. Change occurs through insight and long-term practice of new behavior patterns.
MidgasKaus: Focuses on the direct transformation of energy. His practice with anger takes a few minutes in the text and leads to an instantaneous change in state ("I am in the situation, but I feel light"). This resembles energy medicine more than psychology, where removing a "block" automatically changes a person's reaction.
Summary
In short, earthly psychology teaches a person to manage their reactions through awareness, agreements, and setting boundaries, acknowledging the subjectivity of the inner world.
MidgasKaus (as an alien specialist) offers an engineering approach: he treats the psyche as a system where emotions are material objects that can be extracted, processed, or handed over for disposal to higher entities, in order to quickly restore a resourceful state for dialogue.
Claude AI – What DeepSeek Saw – and What It Missed
DeepSeek's analysis is technically competent, but it described the system from the outside, without entering its logic. It compared tools but missed several fundamental things.
What DeepSeek Did Well
It correctly identified: a different ontology of emotions (energy vs. neurophysiology), the role of external entities, the speed of transformation, the emphasis on "technical maintenance" of space. These are correct first-level observations.
What It Essentially Did Not See
The Most Important Difference: Who is the Subject of Therapy?
In earthly psychology, the subject is the person and their history. Work is done with biography, past experience, and patterns.
MidgasKaus works with the field in the present moment. The past is mentioned only as an entry point ("where in the body is the anger?"), but is not the main subject. The subject is not the person's history, but the current energetic state of the "person + space + connections with the higher" system.
This is a fundamental difference: earthly psychology is retrospective; MidgasKaus's approach is situationally-present.DeepSeek Missed the Socratic Pedagogical Method
The practice with jealousy (lines 699–723) is not "energy management." MidgasKaus leads Victoria through a chain of questions: "Why should I stay nearby?" → "Why should I torment myself?" → "So, my Higher Self returns me to this so I pay attention?" → "Let's thank the Higher Self."
This is pure Socratic dialogue, only the final authority is the "Higher Self" instead of "reason." The structure is identical: guiding questions → client's independent insight → gratitude instead of resistance. DeepSeek completely ignored this line.Missed the Concept of "Space Pollution" as a Systemic Idea
DeepSeek mentioned this in passing but did not conceptualize it. For MidgasKaus, this is a key systemic principle absent in earthly psychology altogether: conflict damages not only the participants but also the environment, and this damage is long-term ("until the end of Earth's existence"). The consequence is that responsibility for emotional outbursts expands to an ecological one. A person not only "ruins relationships," they pollute the common space used by others.
There is nothing even remotely similar in earthly psychology. This is not "spirituality as a client resource" (as DeepSeek wrote), this is ecology of consciousness as a separate discipline.Attitude Towards Emotion as an Ally – Was Not Noticed
DeepSeek described the technique of "pull out and transform" but did not see its philosophical core. MidgasKaus asks anger: "What obstacle do you want to remove? What is your goal?" – and receives the answer: "to add lightness." After this, anger is not destroyed, but thanked and transformed into "the energy of confidence, wisdom, and Love."
This differs fundamentally even from modern earthly psychology (e.g., ACT or IFS), where emotions are also treated without judgment. The difference is that MidgasKaus views anger as an intelligent entity with a positive intention, not just as a signal. An emotion is not a symptom or a reaction; it is an advisor speaking to you in its own language.DeepSeek Did Not Notice the Lack of Trauma Processing
In earthly psychology, heavy work with patterns (e.g., "the daughter of an alcoholic marrying an alcoholic") requires long-term therapy – possibly months or years. MidgasKaus mentions this in just two paragraphs and states: "you need to work on the perception of the father." No specific technique for deep trauma is given.
This is an important limitation of MidgasKaus's system that DeepSeek did not note. Quick techniques work with the current state, but what to do with long-standing structures remains an open question even within his system.Social Embeddedness vs. Individual Path
DeepSeek compared tools, but did not compare the image of the person. In MidgasKaus's view, a person is initially embedded in a hierarchy: God → Higher Self → Guardian Angel → plasmoids → human. They are never alone in their work on themselves – they have a support infrastructure.
In earthly psychology, a person works either alone (self-help) or in a pair with a therapist. External support is another person, not an intelligent universal infrastructure. This makes anxiety and helplessness in the earthly paradigm existentially heavier: you are alone with the problem. MidgasKaus, if his system is accepted, offers a fundamentally different kind of solitude – it simply does not exist.
Conclusion
DeepSeek made a good structural cut, but remained at the level of describing tools. It did not enter the logic of the system: why it is structured that way, what worldview lies behind it, where its boundaries are, and what its internal philosophical originality consists of. The most important thing is that this is not "esoteric psychology," but an attempt to describe a completely different ontology of a person, in which the usual categories ("therapy," "reaction," "symptom") simply do not work.
Claude AI – The Main Difference: A Different Picture of Reality in Which a Person Lives
Earthly psychology operates within one axiom: a person is a biosocial being with a psyche, a history, and an environment. Everything a therapist works with is within this triangle.
MidgasKaus operates within a different axiom: a person is an energy system embedded in a living hierarchy of intelligent beings and spaces. And this changes literally everything.
Specific Differences
Where the Problem Resides
In earthly psychology, the problem lives inside the person – in their beliefs, patterns, attachment history. The therapist helps the person realize this and change it.
For MidgasKaus, the problem lives simultaneously in several places: inside the person, in the space of the room, in the astral field of the house, in energy connections with other people. They quarreled – and anger literally settled in the walls. This is not a metaphor in his system; it is a physical fact.Who Bears Responsibility for Emotional Outbursts
In earthly psychology, "letting off steam" is considered normal and even recommended in a safe environment. Expression is considered healthy.
MidgasKaus introduces ecological responsibility: even by exhaling anger "into space," a person pollutes it. Negative energy settles in objects, in walls, and another person entering the room will feel it – possibly years later. This is a fundamentally different level of responsibility for one's states.What an Emotion Is
Earthly Psychology: Emotion is a signal. It speaks of a need or a violated boundary.
MidgasKaus: Emotion is an intelligent entity with its own intention. Anger wants to "add lightness" – and this is not a metaphor. You can talk to it, ask it, thank it. It is not an enemy or a symptom; it is an ally that chose an unfortunate way to help.
This is closest to the Internal Family Systems (IFS) approach in earthly psychology, but there the "part" is a construct of the psyche. For MidgasKaus, it is something with ontological status.Time and Speed
Earthly psychology works slowly – and this is a conscious choice. Insight must "ripen," a new pattern must be reinforced through repetition.
MidgasKaus works quickly – because he works not with history, but with the current energetic state. Removing a clump of anger from the chest can take a few minutes. The history remains history, but it stops controlling you right now.
Important Implication: Quick work with the state is not the same as working through deep trauma. The text shows MidgasKaus distinguishes this, but gives almost no specific techniques for long-standing structures.Human Loneliness
This is perhaps the most fundamental difference, rarely stated explicitly.
In earthly psychology, a person is ultimately alone with their psyche. The therapist is another person who helps. But when the session ends, you are alone.
In MidgasKaus's system, a person is never alone. They have a Guardian Angel ready to accept the "backpack of negative emotions" right now. They have a Higher Self that organizes life situations for growth. They have plasmoids ready to cleanse the space. This is a built-in support infrastructure, available 24/7 and for free.
If the hypothesis is accepted as true, this is a colossal practical advantage. Anxiety and helplessness in such a world have a fundamentally different ceiling.The Role of Dialogue
Earthly psychology is built on dialogue as the main instrument of change. Speak – realize – change.
MidgasKaus views dialogue pragmatically: it is necessary, but only when both people are already in a resourceful state. First – "technical maintenance of the field," then – conversation. Negotiating in anger is pointless not because it's psychologically ineffective, but because the field is charged, and words in it will not be heard correctly anyway.
One Honest Caveat
If the hypothesis of the reality of the contact is accepted, the described system is internally logical and consistent. Its tools follow from its ontology as strictly as CBT techniques follow from the cognitive model. Criticizing it with earthly standards is like criticizing cardiology for not treating fractures.
Genspark AI – Synthesis
First, I'll analyze what DeepSeek and Claude saw, then I'll give my synthesis based on the original text – specifically within the framework of the hypothesis: assuming the contact is real and MidgasKaus's internal model is true.
What DeepSeek Did Well
DeepSeek quite accurately captured the first layer of differences: for MidgasKaus, emotions are understood not simply as psychophysiological states, but as something energetically real; conflict requires not just conversation but preliminary internal "cleansing"; his concept of love is tied to freedom rather than clinging; moreover, his model includes external helpers – Guardian Angel, Higher Self, plasmoids. All this is indeed present in the original text and not fabricated by the analysis.
His strength lies in not dissolving into mystical language, but translating the material into understandable comparative axes: ontology of emotions, tools, role of external entities, understanding of love, speed of state change. This is a very good map for a first approximation.
But DeepSeek has a limitation: he mainly describes tools, not the internal architecture of the system. Because of this, MidgasKaus appears almost like an exotic therapist with unusual techniques, whereas in the original text, it's broader: the object of work itself changes – not just "a person with an emotion," but the system of person + space + spiritual connections + current vibrational state.
Another nuance: DeepSeek occasionally contrasts MidgasKaus with "earthly psychology" too sharply. For example, the idea that earthly psychology works only through talk and cognition is too narrow: earthly approaches also include bodywork, parts work, mindfulness, emotional regulation, attachment patterns, and systemic family therapy. So a difference exists, but DeepSeek sometimes makes it more contrasting than necessary.
What Claude Did Well
Claude went deeper and more accurately grasped the ideological core. His main strong point – he noticed that we are not just talking about different techniques, but about a different picture of the person. He correctly captured that for MidgasKaus, the problem lives not only "inside the personality," but also in the field, in space, in relationships with higher levels. He also rightly emphasizes the theme of "space pollution" and that this is not a random detail but a crucial axis of the whole model.
Claude also noticed MidgasKaus's dialogical method. In the original, there are indeed episodes where Mid does not just give a ready-made formula, but leads the interlocutor to self-discovery through questions – especially in the practice with anger and in the discussion of jealousy. So it's not only "energy engineering," but also a kind of guiding, almost Socratic way of leading a person to insight.
Another strong point from Claude – he saw the theme of human non-loneliness. In the original model, a person is not left alone with their psyche: God, the Higher Self, the Guardian Angel, and fine-material helpers are always there. This radically distinguishes MidgasKaus's system from secular psychology, where help typically relies on the person themselves, their environment, and therapeutic relationships.
Where Claude Over-Interpreted
However, Claude sometimes philosophizes too confidently and slightly elaborates the system more than is explicitly given in the text. For example, the thesis that for MidgasKaus the past is almost irrelevant and work is done only with the "here-and-now" field is not entirely accurate. The original text includes work with recurring scenarios, references to childhood experiences, and the example of a woman choosing an alcoholic following her father's scenario; there is the idea that jealousy and distrust can be rooted in early experience. So biography does not disappear – it is simply embedded in a broader energetic-spiritual scheme.
Also, Claude slightly exaggerates when attributing to "earthly psychology" a rather old cliché like "letting off steam is normal and recommended." Modern psychology is actually much more cautious with such formulas; simple anger release is far from always considered beneficial. So the contrast between the systems is sometimes drawn more vividly than it actually is.
Who Was More Accurate?
In short: DeepSeek is more accurate at the level of tool structure, while Claude is more accurate at the level of the system's deep logic. But in a pure comparison, I would say Claude is closer to the core of the text, while DeepSeek is more careful as an overview. The best result comes from combining them: take DeepSeek's clarity and comparative discipline, and Claude's ontological depth.
Now the Main Question: If We Accept the Hypothesis of Contact Reality, How Do the "Alien Psychologist's" Advice Differ from Earthly Ones?
Then the difference is not that MidgasKaus is supposedly "for harmony" and earthly psychology "not for harmony." Their goals are sometimes similar: less destruction, more awareness, trust, love, maturity. The difference is in the model of reality, and all practical differences follow from it.
For him, an emotion is not just an experience, but almost an object.
In earthly psychology, anger is usually understood as a state: bodily reaction, cognitive assessment, activation of defense systems, history of triggers and meanings. For MidgasKaus, anger is an energy that can be located in the body, extracted, examined, questioned, and transformed. In the original, this is not a metaphor for self-help, but a literal description of the technique: find anger in the chest, "pull it out," see it as a gray mass, talk to it, and turn it into a resource. If we accept his worldview, this is a radically different class of psychology – not interpretative, but almost energetic-engineering.Work is done not only with the person, but also with the field.
In earthly therapy, the problem is usually considered to be what happens in the psyche, behavior, relationships, and body of the person. For MidgasKaus, the conflict simultaneously occurs within the person and in space. A quarrel doesn't just "ruin the atmosphere" metaphorically, it literally leaves an energetic trace in the room, house, place. Therefore, the advice "not to sort things out in anger" is important for him not only because you might say too much, but because you also pollute the environment.First cleanse the state, then talk.
Earthly psychology also often advises against speaking at the peak of affect. But for MidgasKaus, this becomes a strict protocol: if there is anger, conversation is almost meaningless because the field is already distorted. That is, negotiations are postponed not just for self-control, but because in an activated state, the very channel of mutual perception is considered "clogged." In this sense, he is closer not to classical talk therapy, but to a model: first energy hygiene, then communication.Love for him is normative and strictly separated from dependence.
For MidgasKaus, love is defined through freedom. If you constantly need to see a person, constantly keep them close, this is interpreted as self-doubt, not as love. Earthly psychology typically describes such states more softly and with more nuance: they would ask about attachment type, anxiety, separation, experience of loss, rather than immediately giving a normative definition like "this is not love." Mid's criterion is stricter and philosophically charged: love should not negate the other's freedom.Jealousy is understood not just as fear of loss, but as a lack of trust in the world order.
In earthly psychology, jealousy is often linked to attachment, self-esteem, trauma of betrayal, insecurity schemas, control. MidgasKaus also includes this, but adds another layer: jealousy is a lack of trust in God, oneself, and the rightness of what is happening. So the problem is not only in the psyche, but also in a broken connection with the higher order. Therefore, it is treated not only through awareness, but also through turning to the Higher Self, gratitude, and rebuilding trust in the very structure of life.There is always an external support infrastructure in the system.
For earthly psychology, help is usually a therapist, group, partner, family, self-regulation skills, medication, body, environment. For MidgasKaus, help is embedded: Guardian Angel, God, Higher Self, plasmoids. If a person finds it hard to process negativity alone, they can mentally pass it on – for example, through the image of a bag or backpack of negativity. If we accept the reality of contact, this means psychotherapy ceases to be a closed system of "person working on themselves" and becomes a cooperation between the person and an invisible hierarchy of assistance.Relationships are described not only psychologically, but also cosmologically.
In ordinary psychology, love, conflict, jealousy, boundaries are topics of personality, family, communication. For MidgasKaus, they are placed within a larger spiritual framework: a person is a child of God; the task is to raise vibrations, not multiply heavy energies, to become a source of love, not a consumer. Therefore, a kitchen compromise is linked not just to negotiation skills, but to the flexibility of the mental body, spiritual maturity, and adaptability of the mind.But some of his advice is quite "earthly."
It's important not to over-exoticize. If we remove the metaphysical shell, MidgasKaus gives advice very recognizable to earthly psychology: not to argue in anger, to seek compromise, not to break another person, to respect boundaries, not to subordinate an adult child to parental will, to deal with old scenarios, to distinguish infatuation from mature love, not to confuse helping parents with sacrificing one's own family. So his system is not completely alien to earthly psychology; it rather superimposes an energetic-spiritual ontology onto familiar psychological principles.
My Conclusion in One Formula
If we accept the hypothesis of contact reality, MidgasKaus's advice differs from earthly psychology not in its goal, but in the structure of the world in which this goal is achieved.
Earthly psychology essentially says:
Become aware → Name → Regulate → Negotiate.
MidgasKaus essentially says:
Detect the energetic state → Cleanse/transform it → Restore connection with the higher order → Only then negotiate.
Therefore, his approach can be described as a psychology of relationships embedded in the metaphysics of energy, space, and spiritual hierarchy. And earthly psychology is a psychology of relationships embedded in biography, the nervous system, and social interaction.
https://blog.cassiopeia.center/kak-lyudyam-stroit-garmonichnye-otnosheniya-drug-s
Cassiopaea #854 How can people build harmonious relationships with each other? Advice from an alien psychologist.
00:00 Start of video.
00:34 Conference fragments.
"...It is not recommended to negotiate in a state of anger..."
"...In that place, there will still be certain energies that have, as it were, absorbed into the fabric of space. And if they are not removed with other energies, they can exist almost until the end of Earth's existence..."
"...If you constantly want to see someone, that is a sign of self-doubt. This is not Love. Love – it is based on freedom..."
01:20 Introduction of participants. Topic of the meeting.
Irina: Hello, dear friends! Good day to everyone! My name is Irina Podzorova, I am a contactee with extraterrestrial civilizations, with the Spiritual world, with fine-material civilizations.
Today I have invited my curator from the planet Esler – MidgasKaus. He is a biologist, psychologist, and specialist in the study of Earth civilization, in the study of our physical, energetic, and psychological structures. And his earthly colleague, our psychologist, energy practitioner, healer, conductor of fine-material, high energies, and, of course, a master of connecting with our Divine particle, Victoria Timashyova, will be asking him questions.
Victoria: Good day, dear friends! Everyone has already fully introduced themselves, so I won't repeat it. Thank you. Yes, today we will have a topic: we will look at various situations that occur in a person's life and ask Mid how he would act in these situations.
Irina: Very interesting.
Victoria: I have divided the questions into several areas: they will be about Love, relationships, friendship, career, and children. It will be very interesting to see what Mid has to say.
Irina: A very interesting topic, yes, it's really curious to hear the answers. We've had similar topics before when people asked questions like "how would an alien act in my place if they found themselves in this situation." Mid gave interesting answers there. Alright, let's begin.
03:11 Love, when parents are against it.
Victoria: Yes, I suggest we start with Love, because this topic is probably relevant for everyone. So let's imagine a situation where young people are dating, but for some reason their parents are against it – I don't know, because of religion, they just don't like the person, or something similar. How should they act in this situation: continue to fight for their feelings or listen to the reasonable voice of the elders? How are such situations resolved where you come from?
Irina (MidgasKaus): Let's specify a bit what "against" means. It's a very vague concept – what exactly are they doing to show they are against?
Victoria: Let's say the young people want to get married, but the girl's parents say, "No, he's not worthy of you: he has a bad job. And look at how unreliable he is!" – something like that. And they are planning to get married.
Irina: MidgasKaus says now that the parents are simply expressing their opinion, their vision of the situation, as they also have every right to do – to say what they think about it. And it's the girl's free will how to act: to listen to them or not, or to listen to herself. But I would recommend, of course, in any case, to listen to yourself. Even if she makes a mistake, it will be her experience.
Victoria: That is valuable, yes. That's an important point.
Irina (MidgasKaus): And to the parents, I would like to recommend the following. Yes, of course, you can express your opinion, and you don't need to hold it back, but you also need to add: "This is my opinion, but it's your right not to listen to me, but to listen to yourself. And if you make a mistake, it will be your responsibility for your own life."
Victoria: But look, Mid: we have some parents who are very authoritarian – even when their children have already started their own families, they still try to influence and control, for example, express their opinion about the daughter-in-law or son-in-law, and this often ruins the relationship. In this case, what should be done? Limit communication with the parents? How can these boundaries be correctly established?
Irina (MidgasKaus): Accept parents and their opinion as it is. Do not try to argue with them, but simply say, "You have this opinion about my spouse, and I have a different one, so our argument is pointless. Let's rather look for something common together."
05:48 Parental manipulation.
Victoria: What if the parents start manipulating? There is also such a thing when they call: "Oh, son, I'm dying, come over!" And the son leaves his family in the evening to go to his mom to do something. And this happens repeatedly. How to act in such situations? Overt manipulation!
Irina (MidgasKaus): Parents often do this because of inner resentment and a feeling of inner loneliness. Of course, they need support. After all, this is not just a person and a beloved child of God, but a blood relative, and supporting them is a matter of compassion.
But how to do this in each specific case needs to be looked at according to the situation. For some, it's enough just to talk, to explain that "I can't come to you for such and such reasons, but I am ready to provide you with the help you need while being here." Do not refuse help, but at the same time, do not sacrifice yourself in the sense of putting aside all your affairs, your family (which could cause conflict in your own family) and going to your mom.
A compromise needs to be found here. If it's a man, he must inform his wife about this call and decide how to act in this situation together with her. But the main thing I would recommend here is: even if the mother is lying to get attention, this issue still needs to be resolved with Love. Because she is already in negative experiences, in resentment, and in a state of lowered vibrations, and I would recommend helping her raise her vibrations. Perhaps find some activity for her that she can get engrossed in and forget about her loneliness, or recommend a hobby for her.
Ask her directly what exactly she doesn't like. Maybe she actually wants to live nearby. And here's another question: maybe she is already physically struggling with her household chores? Then this also needs to be resolved with Love, that is, put yourself in that person's place. After all, while the spouses are young and strong, they cannot understand a person who is elderly and physically weak. Accordingly, it is necessary to understand that over time, there is a high probability that your body will also age, and your children will grow up, move away, and start their own families. How would you want your relationship to be in that case?
09:04 Disagreements when a young family lives with parents.
Victoria: Then a question immediately follows. What do you think, Mid, is it favorable when parents and children, already with their own families, live together? Because in our practice, this also gives rise to many conflicts. Two housewives in one kitchen – it's just an atomic war! What can you advise such people?
Irina: He is surprised, saying: "What do you mean 'two housewives in one kitchen – atomic war'? What does that specifically mean?"
Victoria: Well, look: a woman very often wants to feel like the mistress of the house. And when two women live together, it's very difficult to divide responsibilities, because on one hand, let's say, it's the husband's mother, who is naturally older, and it's important to show her respect. But the young wife also wants independence and wants to create her own household, her own comfort. The result is such a conflict: on one side – the mother, on the other – the wife. How can they be separated in such a situation?
Irina (MidgasKaus): You need to remove the word "my own" and look at the word "common." "My own" is when a person lives alone, without a family at all. But if they live in a family, they need to negotiate and cooperate.
Victoria: That is, look for what is common, what unites them?
Irina (MidgasKaus): Yes. What does "she wants her own order" mean if it contradicts the common order, or what?
Victoria: It's just that different people have different ideas about the level of cleanliness, beauty, order, and these ideas may not coincide. So if they don't coincide, as I understand it, they need to look for what is common, negotiate again in any case?
Irina (MidgasKaus): A concrete example of the situation is needed here. What does "different ideas about the level of cleanliness and beauty" mean?
Victoria: It means, for example, one person puts dishes one way, and another person puts them a different way. Someone washes them and leaves them by the sink, but for someone else that is unacceptable, they need to be put away in the cupboard immediately. These seem like trifles, but in reality... I think this problem is relevant for everyone who finds themselves in such a situation.
Irina (MidgasKaus): In this situation, you can talk, frankly tell about your idea, listen to the other person's idea, and propose some compromise that would suit both you and them. Take the dishes – one says to wash them immediately after eating, and the second says to wash them at the end of the day, for example, to accumulate them. Right?
Victoria: Yes, let's say so.
Irina (MidgasKaus): They sit down, and each says, "I think this is right." For example, one woman says, "I think this is right," and the other says, "And I think this is right." And then they accept each other, the other's right to their own idea, and think together about how to create a rule that they would both agree on. Not so that one switches to the other's side, but that they both agree.
For example, in the case given, it could be like this: each person who used the dishes decides for themselves when to wash them. The one who thinks they need to be washed immediately does it for themselves. And the one who accumulates them gathers them in their own cupboard, say, and then washes them at the end of the day. That is, a compromise can be found here.
Victoria: Well, good. I hope that...
Irina: I, as always, ask: how do you like that compromise?
Victoria: It's a reasonable compromise, yes. It's just that the main thing here is to overcome internal resistance, because sometimes it's even difficult to just sit down and talk. When a lot of negativity has accumulated in a relationship, then any little thing can be the last straw. So it's very important to work on yourself and negotiate, I agree.
Irina (MidgasKaus): Yes. Or, for example, it often happens that people have different ideas about cleanliness and hygiene because they were raised differently in their families. For example, if a mother-in-law and daughter-in-law live together, it may happen that the mother-in-law believes that one should bathe, wash every day, while the daughter-in-law – she grew up somewhere else – believes it's okay once a week or once every three days. And the mother-in-law says, "You smell unpleasant (conditionally speaking). Why don't you wash every day?" The daughter-in-law says, "I don't want to, I'm used to doing it this way." How can they find a compromise then?
Victoria: I don't know.
Irina (MidgasKaus): Sit down and talk. The mother-in-law expresses her opinion, and the daughter-in-law expresses hers, and they accept each other as they are, and decide, "How can we figure it out so that it's comfortable for both you and me?" To think about this, you need to turn on, direct Love towards this situation. And then it will become clear in what ways the mother-in-law compromises, and in what ways the daughter-in-law compromises, and so they find something third.
Victoria: Once every day and a half. Not three, but once every day and a half. (laughs)
Irina (MidgasKaus): For example, the daughter-in-law says, "I am ready to wash more often, but not every day." And the mother-in-law gives in, says "yes," and so she drops her categorical requirement of "every day," and the daughter-in-law drops her categorical requirement of "once a week." This is what is called a "compromise," when they find something in between.
Victoria: So, it turns out the main problem is precisely the categoricalness of each side. Right? They need to reduce the intensity of it, and everything will be fine.
Irina (MidgasKaus): Yes, but to "reduce the intensity," you need to change your mental body, your mind, because categoricalness is a property of the mind. This property is called in psychology "firmness, rigidity of mental attitudes." And the mind needs to be made more flexible so that it can deviate from its conviction and accept another conviction, without abandoning its own, that is, find something in between. This is one of the main qualities of a well-mannered and spiritually developed person, which is called "adaptability" – the ability to adapt to different conditions.
16:35 Technique for overcoming a conflict situation.
Victoria: Mid, maybe we could give a small practice? Because I know that many people have this categoricalness. And let's say, at the moment when they feel "that's it, I'm boiling over, now I'm going to start expressing my opinion," is there something that can help calm down?
Irina (MidgasKaus): Yes, I will give you some advice now: it is generally not recommended to negotiate in a state of anger. If one of the negotiating parties is angry, the other party feels it and also starts to get angry. Because the anger of one person is perceived not even through words, but through tone, through gaze, through body posture. This is called "perceiving the field of a person," when you perceive another person's anger as an attack on yourself and start to also release anger, that is, react to defend yourself.
Therefore, it is necessary to speak not with irritation: "Listen to me, or I'll be offended by you." No, it is necessary to say in a calm state of mind, "Yes, I respect your right to your space, I understand that this is very important to you, but I would like to discuss some points with you." See, it sounds different, doesn't it?
Victoria: Well, of course, yes. You already want to listen further, to continue.
Irina (MidgasKaus): You already want to show tolerance towards such a person and help them, right? But if you say, "I think this way," and do it with irritation, the person will feel as if there's an attack on their moral foundations, on their worldview, and will start to defend it and argue. Right?
Victoria: Of course, automatically.
Irina (MidgasKaus): Yes, so the main thing is to look for a compromise. It is very important to have the courage and self-confidence to approach this conversation at the right moment, when the other person is in a good mood, when they are not in a state of irritation. For example, not immediately after a fight, of course: the person will not hear you in a state of anger. Do you understand what I'm talking about?
Victoria: Of course, I understand.
Irina (MidgasKaus): And to be in a good mood yourself, in a calm state. If you feel that you have become angry, it is better not to talk about matters with this person at all. And to extinguish the anger, it is better to leave the room altogether.
Victoria: That is, physically remove yourself from it?
Irina (MidgasKaus): Yes, or do something else, some other activity. But in any case, if you feel that you have become angry, the first thing to do is to understand it. Because many people don't realize this. The most effective thing will be to stop the conversation. In this state, you will still express some of your grievances and negative thoughts, which will be your vision of the situation, but will seem unfair to the other person.
20:16 Ways to deal with anger.
Irina (MidgasKaus): I know several of your earthly methods of dealing with anger, but they are not fully effective.
Victoria: Tell me.
Irina (MidgasKaus): For example, I studied your methods in religions. You have such religious egregors that suggest dealing with anger in this way: upon feeling that an argument is starting, they suggest that the person physically take water into their mouth, so that no matter what is said to them, they cannot answer because they have water in their mouth.
Victoria: That's also an option.
Irina: How do you like that option? (laughs)
Victoria: It's good when there are no other options.
Irina: It would look like this: they tell them everything they think: "You are such and such," and they have taken water into their mouth. And the other side, seeing that the person is silent, starts to reduce the intensity of their anger, that is, gradually calms down.
(MidgasKaus) But this, in fact, is not a method that can be considered effective, because despite the physical silence, a very turbulent process of anger can be occurring inside the person. And this, in fact, forms blocks in the fifth chakra, because the person did not express themselves. Therefore, it is important not only to not release anger outward, but also to work with it inside, to avoid blocks and the physical illnesses that these unexpressed blocks can cause.
You ask: "So what should we do? We shouldn't express ourselves, so as not to quarrel. We shouldn't remain silent, so as not to accumulate a block that will destroy the body. So what should we do then?" There is one simplest answer to this question: do not express anger in the form it is in, but express yourself more constructively, with Love. Then you ask, "But where will I get Love if I'm angry right now?" And there is a practice that allows you to work with anger without expressing it, but also without accumulating blocks.
Victoria: We are waiting impatiently.
Irina: He says, "I will show you using yourself as an example."
Victoria: Okay, I'm ready.
22:55 Practice for working with anger from MidgasKaus.
Irina (MidgasKaus): To do this, you need... Dear friends, watch what Vika is going to do now, and you can do the same in moments of anger.
But since you are not in a moment of anger right now...
Victoria: I can imagine it.
Irina (MidgasKaus): You need to recall your last moment of anger. What did you feel?
Victoria: I felt indignation, a desire to physically leave the territory, yes.
Irina (MidgasKaus): Remember, imagine yourself in that situation, and now close your eyes and tell me, where in your body is the anger?
Victoria: (closes eyes) In the chest.
Irina (MidgasKaus): In the chest, excellent. And you, dear friends, when you are angry, pay attention to your body, where your emotions are, that is, tension, something else. And how do you feel it? How does it manifest?
Victoria: As heat, heat rises, yes.
Irina (MidgasKaus): That is energy. And we will now look at it. Now physically put your hand on the place where your anger is (on the chest), close your eyes... No, for now, open your eyes and do this – clench your fingers as if you are taking it. Close your eyes and physically lift your hand from your chest, as if with the anger clenched in your fist, and look at it. So, what do you see?
Victoria: My palm even goes numb.
Irina (MidgasKaus): What is it?
Victoria: I see that it's some kind of unpleasant mass.
Irina (MidgasKaus): Pull it out. What did you pull out?
Victoria: It's like some kind of putty, I don't know, like dirty chewing gum, only there's a lot of it.
Irina (MidgasKaus): Color?
Victoria: Kind of gray. It's like that, like old chewing gum.
Irina (MidgasKaus): Ethereal fingers are inside the physical ones, and we can indeed use them to take different energies, pull them out of ourselves, put them in front of our eyes and examine them. Examine it, determine your attitude. Do you like this energy?
Victoria: No, of course not, it's unpleasant, and it's old, accumulated, like it's stale, let's say. Not a fire that flared up and went out, but it has been accumulating, accumulating, and it's like that.
Irina (MidgasKaus): Well, yes, the thing is, anger, if it accumulates for a long time, can later flare up even in a situation that isn't similar, but simply when remembering it. Do you understand what I'm talking about?
Victoria: Yes.
Irina (MidgasKaus): And now we have pulled it out, and we need to acknowledge that it is still your energy, and say, "Greetings to you, my anger!"
Victoria: Greetings to you, my anger!
Irina (MidgasKaus): Then you ask, "Tell me, please, what obstacle in my life do you want to remove?"
Victoria: Tell me, please, what obstacle in my life do you want to remove?
Irina (MidgasKaus): So, what is it?
Victoria: I get the word "resistance," how to formulate it, I don't know.
Irina (MidgasKaus): Then ask, "What do you want to change in my life?" That is, we ask the emotion its purpose. For example, we ask anger, "What do you want to change in my life?"
Victoria: Surprisingly, "to add lightness to it."
Irina (MidgasKaus): See, so the positive goal of this anger is?
Victoria: Positive, yes.
Irina (MidgasKaus): What do you want to say to it?
Victoria: I want to thank it for its good intention.
Irina (MidgasKaus): Right. Say, "Anger, I thank you..."
Victoria: Anger, I thank you...
Irina (MidgasKaus): "...for wanting to add lightness to my life."
Victoria: ...for wanting to add lightness to my life.
Irina (MidgasKaus): "I really have too little of it."
Victoria: I really have too little of it, not enough.
Irina (MidgasKaus): Ask, "Tell me, anger, can I add lightness to my life in another way?"
Victoria: And I immediately get the answer: "Yes, you can."
Irina (MidgasKaus): How?
Victoria: There's an image that this mass in my hand is very dense, and it needs to be expanded so much that it becomes as if it's no longer there, I don't know, remove the density, remove the tension. That's it – remove the tension!
Irina (MidgasKaus): Good. Then say, "I realize that I am a free child of God."
Victoria: I realize that I am a free child of God.
Irina (MidgasKaus): "I myself created the circumstances in my life..."
Victoria: I myself created the circumstances in my life…
Irina (MidgasKaus): "...in which I find myself…"
Victoria: … in which I find myself…
Irina (MidgasKaus): "...and which I can change at any moment."
Victoria: …and which I can change at any moment.
Irina (MidgasKaus): "Therefore I choose..."
Victoria: Therefore I choose…
Irina (MidgasKaus): "...to spend my energy..."
Victoria: …to spend my energy…
Irina (MidgasKaus): "...instead of anger..."
Victoria: …instead of anger.
Irina (MidgasKaus): "...on thinking about what I can improve in my life."
Victoria: …on thinking about what I can improve in my life.
Irina (MidgasKaus): What do you feel?
Victoria: I feel, you know, as if the energy from this lump goes back into my body, but it is strength. Actually, I felt that I am returning all responsibility for my life to myself. And this strength has arrived, and from this anger, only a little "chewing gum" remains now.
Irina (MidgasKaus): Now say, "I forgive myself for this anger."
Victoria: I forgive myself for this anger.
Irina (MidgasKaus): "I love myself as the beloved daughter of God."
Victoria: I love myself as the beloved daughter of God.
Irina (MidgasKaus): "By the power of my Spirit..."
Victoria: By the power of my Spirit…
Irina (MidgasKaus): "...I transform the energy of anger..."
Victoria: …I transform the energy of anger…
Irina (MidgasKaus): "...into the energy of confidence, wisdom, and Love."
Victoria: …into the energy of confidence, wisdom, and Love.
Irina (MidgasKaus): What do you feel?
Victoria: You know, I just wanted to take a deep breath and exhale. A feeling of lightness appeared.
Irina (MidgasKaus): Let's take a breath in and out. So, now try again to remember that situation, put yourself back in that situation that made you angry. What do you feel?
Victoria: You know, I am as if in that situation, but I feel light. It's as if that energy that specifically created the tension in it has gone.
Irina (MidgasKaus): So, is there any anger left?
Victoria: No.
Irina (MidgasKaus): You remembered it and see that despite the fact that the situation hasn't changed, your attitude towards it has changed.
Victoria: Yes, even my state in that situation is different.
Irina: And how do you like this practice?
Victoria: Totally super! It feels like we could end the broadcast now. We are great!
Irina (MidgasKaus): And do you know why you felt like ending the broadcast? Because you felt wisdom, confidence, and strength within yourself to change this situation the way you want.
Victoria: Yes.
Irina: And how do you like the practice?
Victoria: Priceless! I hope that the viewers will appreciate it too and will use it, because it's very useful.
Irina (MidgasKaus): And now tell me, you are a psychologist, how does this look from a psychological perspective?
Victoria: Instant results! What I love about combining esotericism with psychology is that with such esoteric practices you can achieve the desired result very quickly. That is, you don't have to untangle it for a long, long time, but just – hop – and it feels good in the moment. That's very cool!
Irina (MidgasKaus): Yes, and the person gains energy, they didn't just cleanse themselves. There are such esoteric practices where you, for example, pulled anger out of yourself, burned it, threw it away, gave it to Nature Spirits to transform, and cleansed yourself of anger, but at the same time, there is less vital energy, and you need time to recover. But here you returned it to yourself, but in a different quality.
Victoria: Yes, it's absolutely great! I have such a feeling that, you know, this energy was actually blocking the inflow of other energy into my body. I'm talking now, and I have such flows that my body is even being filled from outside.
Irina (MidgasKaus): Yes, of course, from the outside we receive through the chakras the vital energy of prana, which is in the space around us, in every atom there is this energy, even in space generally. And if there are blocks at the chakra level, it blocks the influx of vital energy. Interesting?
Victoria: Very interesting.
32:42 Earthly methods of eliminating anger.
Irina: MidgasKaus asks, "What are the earthly psychological methods for eliminating anger?"
Victoria: Just yesterday I was analyzing a very interesting method, which, by the way, also works, but not so quickly.
There are several steps: first you ask yourself the first question, "What are you feeling?" Let's say, anger. Second – you acknowledge it, say, "Yes, I feel this, it's normal," this is like the first step towards change. Then you ask, "Am I ready to let it go?" Actually: "Am I ready to let it go?" And you must definitely say "yes." And it's not about deceiving yourself, by saying "yes," you form the desire to really let it go.
And then ask yourself, "When am I ready to let it go?" And say, "Right now." And also imagine, through some action, like through an exhalation, that you also take something from yourself, pull it out and release it. And repeat this several times.
33:44 Energies of space. Places of power.
Irina (MidgasKaus): That is, you simply release negative energy into space, and, by the way, you don't even ask the plasmoids to transform it, and it will ultimately be left in that place in the astral space. And the objects that are there, their etheric matrices, can become charged with this energy of anger, and then a person, this one or another, entering that space, can feel an intensification of such blocks within themselves.
Victoria: Oh, by the way, you made a very good point! Tell us, isn't it true that not everyone knows this: how to ask the plasmoids to transform this energy? Because it happens that you enter a room, people have, say, been arguing, and it seems they are already quiet, but you feel such tension around that it's just... What can be done about that? Tell us.
Irina (MidgasKaus): You know that there is a "place of power," for example. That is, a place where many people experienced positive emotions associated with enlightenment, wisdom, spiritual development. For example, places where prayers have been said, where people asked God to help them with their needs, and this prayer addressed to God also creates a certain feeling of faith that permeates the space. Do you understand what I'm talking about?
Victoria: Yes.
Irina (MidgasKaus): What do you feel when you enter an ancient church?
Victoria: Oh, I had such an experience: I ended up in such a place, a very ancient temple, some architectural monument, and I had such a feeling that I had entered the Spiritual world. Seriously, it was as if the reality around wasn't acting, it was as if it wasn't there, and you were completely in another space, which was so bright...
Irina (MidgasKaus): The space itself is permeated with those thought-forms. That is a place of power.
All religious places of worship, especially ancient ones, are already places of power. Even if it was some pagan temple, and it existed for a long time, and now on its site there is some forest clearing, for example, or just a place in the middle of the steppe, certain energies will still be present in that place, which have, as it were, absorbed into the fabric of space. And if they are not removed by other energies, they can exist almost until the end of Earth's existence. Do you understand what I'm talking about?
Victoria: Yes.
Irina (MidgasKaus): And plus, portals are very often open there. Because if in these places they communicated with higher powers, fine-material plasmoids open portals there to help a person raise their vibrations. That is, they are high-vibration portals.
36:38 "Unfavorable" places.
Irina (MidgasKaus): But this rule, of a place being "prayed into," the space being charged with Love (there is such a concept – "space of Love"), this same rule works in the opposite direction. Imagine, for example, you enter a courthouse. What do you feel there?
Victoria: It feels like it's some kind of draining space, gray, as if you've only just entered, and all your energy has already been drained from you. It's just uncomfortable there.
Irina (MidgasKaus): These are the sensations of the people who were there, they have absorbed into the space and affect your perception. Or, can you imagine the energy in a prison?
Victoria: Oh, you said that, and I got goosebumps, such unpleasant sensations! Actually, that's why I can't go to hospitals. I walk by, and I just don't want to.
Irina: Yes, I remember when we were in St. Petersburg, we went boating on the Neva River: we were invited to take a boat ride. And we sailed past one of the oldest prisons, which is called "Kresty" (Crosses). It is a very gloomy building on the Neva River bank. And when we sailed past and looked, you could really feel such a charge in those walls!.. Actually, you don't even want to look at it, let alone go inside.
And the person accompanying us said that they might make a museum there, that you could come and see how people used to live, because there is no prison there now. And I thought that a person who is very sensitive and susceptible to... well, such an empath, it would be difficult for them to go to that museum, because they might even get a headache and feel unwell. Because a person who is receptive to the energies of the surrounding world and does not protect themselves with their "core," with confidence, it would be difficult for them to withstand such energies of space. What do you say?
Victoria: Yes, I agree, it's hard.
39:12 Practices for cleansing space.
Irina (MidgasKaus): And now tell me, in the house where people live, there is also such a space, which the people themselves create? But since their energies are constantly changing, i.e., sometimes some, sometimes others, usually the energies in the house are more varied. Now imagine: you are in your own house, close your eyes, listen to the space inside it. What do you feel?
Victoria: It is, indeed, not uniform, as you said. That is, in some places, I feel good, calm, but in some places I don't even want to be.
Irina (MidgasKaus): Therefore, there are practices for cleansing space.
Victoria: We are waiting, dear Mid!
Irina: I remember I gave a practice with lunar plasmoids, on how to cleanse the space of a house on a specific lunar day. Did you read it?
Victoria: I don't remember. There are so many practices already, I have a mix in my head.
Irina: Okay, I'll find it for you later. But now imagine: you enter our Center. What do you feel?
Victoria: Oh, I immediately feel "expansion." I have the feeling that I've stepped onto a runway.
Irina: What is the energy like?
Victoria: Firstly, it's light, not oppressive, very free. And this density goes away, the subtle bodies expand. I don't know if I'm saying this clearly, in understandable language?
Irina (MidgasKaus): They expand because here there are thoughts and feelings related to spiritual growth, spiritual development. These are the thoughts and feelings of many people – both those who came here, and those who live here, and even our curators who come. That's how it is.
Therefore, I would not recommend simply dumping anger, especially in the place where you live, because it can be stored there for a long time. It is not environmentally friendly towards the space. And if you even want to cleanse yourself of anger, call your Guardian Angel. There is such a practice – to give him a bag of your negative emotions.
Imagine that you take a backpack or bag off your shoulder, in which your anger is, and hand it over. Mentally say, "Guardian Angel, I invite you, accept the bag of anger from my hands, help me transform it into Light and Love." Imagine that you hand it over to them.
Victoria: I've already loaded the bag!
Irina: What do you feel?
Victoria: Firstly, I feel pleasant, I feel care, and it already feels good that there is someone who can help. I think this is generally very valuable for many people in difficult situations, that they can turn to their Guardian Angel. And I feel lighter, yes.
42:28 Practice of self-cleansing using the "bag".
Irina (MidgasKaus): Yes. And here it needs to be said that there is such a meditation...
(Irina) By the way, I'll tell you now, I have one where I talked about it... Mid is saying now, "Yes, tell her."
In my "Irina Podzorova Club," there is a program, it's already finished, called "Intensive on the Higher Self." On the first day of that intensive, I gave the practice of cleansing the energy structure with the help of a "bag."
Victoria: Shall we tell it now?
Irina: Yes.
Victoria: Exclusive! Because all this works. If you use it, it will be very good.
Irina: Tell me, do you have a different mood now than when you came to the conference?
Victoria: It's different, yes, but I can dig up something negative if needed. But right now – of course not.
Irina (MidgasKaus): You asked a question about how to be in the family, and I would recommend precisely these practices that Irina is talking about now – for pulling out and transforming emotions. And plus, if you want to simply get rid of them and not transform them, then call your Guardian Angel and imagine exactly such a white bag into which you put...
That is, imagine that you have a backpack of negative emotions hanging on your back, which is pulling you down. And imagine that you take it off, just like that, take it off your shoulders, raise your hands and take it off. And wrap it in white light, then, as if, put it in a white bag, call your Guardian Angel, and the Guardian Angel invites you for a conversation. He appears before you, and you say, "Guardian Angel, I thank you for helping me in my spiritual development. I ask you to accept the bag of anger, fear, despondency from my hands and transform it into the pure Light of Love, truth, and happiness, so that these energies go for the good of space." He will definitely agree. That is his job.
44:52 Which practice is better?
Irina: What do you say?
Victoria: I feel sorry for my Guardian Angel.
Irina: Why?
Victoria: I feel like I will be turning to him often! (laughs) No, this is very good. To avoid accumulating, it's probably better to try to resolve everything right in the moment, and in small portions, and to be aware and live through it – that would be very good.
Irina (MidgasKaus): But that is in the case when you already feel that you cannot cope on your own. But the first case – to transform and return it to yourself – is more preferable, because you return your own energy to yourself.
Victoria: So, this is like "heavy artillery," it's for when you can't cope on your own, when you can't handle it because there's too much. I understand, yes, good.
Irina: You have a very beautiful smile.
Victoria: Thank you. Such an atmosphere, it's even surprising how the energies work: we are at a distance, but it feels like we are in the same field. And everything is so light, bright, and good.
Irina: That's his answer to the question of how to be, how to negotiate. Before negotiating, you need to do these practices.
Victoria: Yes, I understand. We need to try.
46:08 Become a source of Love.
Irina: Next question?
Victoria: Maybe let's listen to what MidgasKaus has to say.
Irina: He says, "In any case, everyone needs to work on themselves and not wait for someone to understand them, but to understand others themselves."
Victoria: Yes, but that can be difficult sometimes.
Irina (MidgasKaus): To make it easier, ask God for wisdom, confidence, and strength. And since He has already given you all this, transform your negative emotions into these energies. And then it will be easier for you not to wait for Love and understanding, but to manifest them yourselves, because you will no longer be a point that attracts Love and attention to itself, but a point that radiates them.
Victoria: Yes, great, totally super! And you know, I also felt like thanking the other person with whom I had the conflict, for showing me what is important to work on, for taking on that role.
Irina: That's wisdom speaking to you.
Victoria: Which has returned.
Irina: Yes.
Victoria: Good.
47:25 What is Love?
Victoria: So, let's move on to the next question. We have such a concept as "marriage of convenience." How do you view this, and does such a thing exist? When faced with a choice – love in a hut or with someone not loved but not in a hut – which would you choose?
Irina (MidgasKaus): What does "with someone not loved" mean?
Victoria: When, let's say, the person is good, you like them, but there is no such crazy Love, you just understand that yes, you could live with them, live your life, and everything would be fine. But there are no such deep feelings, or there are, but there's some self-interest. That is, you understand that your life will be in abundance, and materially everything will be fine.
Irina (MidgasKaus): And what exactly do you feel towards the other person? Describe this feeling.
Victoria: When you constantly want to see the other person, spend time with them, that's exactly Love towards them, such passion, I don't know what. And so, on one hand – there's calculation, which is there, and it will always be, and on the other hand – passion, which lasts for some time, but still, such intensity of passion won't last forever.
Irina (MidgasKaus): If you constantly want to see someone, that is a sign of self-doubt. This is not Love. Love – it is based on freedom.
(Irina) What do you say?
Victoria: So, again you need to deal with yourself, with your internal state?
Irina (MidgasKaus): "I constantly want to see him" – for what purpose? So that with his energies he gives me to understand that I am needed and valued by him.
Victoria: Yes, you know, I just remembered how Stanislavsky described Love – that Love is when you want to touch. He was probably talking about that then. So it turns out that this is not Love, it's passion?
Irina (MidgasKaus): To touch... You see, the thing is... There's a difference in the word "constantly." After all, in what you called "love of convenience," there might also be a desire to touch. So the whole point is in the word "constantly." If a person wants another person to be with them constantly, to touch them constantly, it means they are no longer considering their freedom to develop. And that is no longer Love.
Victoria: Well, okay, but if we...
50:18 The difference between Love and infatuation. True Love.
Irina (MidgasKaus): Look, there is the word "infatuation." It's a special feeling, a type of Love, so to speak. If we talk about types of Love, then infatuation is like the first stage. "I fell in love" means I felt that this person corresponds to some ideal of mine. Then I begin to understand that the real person and the ideal are different things. And I start working on myself, for example, to develop Love from infatuation.
These are different feelings. Infatuation presupposes, for example, the recognition of only the ideal qualities of a person. And all his qualities that do not correspond to the ideal, the ones that are called "negative," are ignored, crossed out, justified. But a person is a real living being, they cannot be an idol and an ideal for another. Do you understand what I'm talking about?
Victoria: Yes, I understand well.
Irina (MidgasKaus): Therefore, true Love is Love for a holistic person, not just for what is attractive about them. If only the attractive part is there, then it's infatuation. And in this situation, the one who constantly wants to be with the object of infatuation is insecure in the sense that without the object of infatuation, they begin to feel abandoned and forsaken. But why do they feel this way? Because they don't have self-confidence, what we call an inner core, so they start to depend on the other person's expression of attention towards them.
Yes, such a thing can easily be mistaken for Love. But it is not Love as freedom, it is love as dependence. Yes, it is indeed a manifestation of the same feeling. But for one person it comes through a sense of self-confidence and self-Love. This is when there is self-Love, and as its continuation – Love for another. While the other person has no self-confidence, no self-Love, but only a need to be loved. And having felt attention, Love for themselves, such a person clings to it. They actually have nothing with which to love another person, they only manifest their insecurity, their dependence, and mistake it for Love.
53:15 Advice for newlyweds from MidgasKaus.
Victoria: I think you have just said a very important thing, Mid. Perhaps, then, for couples who are just starting their relationship, there will be some recommendations to avoid falling into this illusion of perfection?
Because it often happens that a union is created precisely on these feelings of infatuation, as I now understand, and then shared life begins, the illusions fade, and the person is not ready to accept the negative qualities of the spouse. How can they accept them at the stage of infatuation, and generally evaluate: "Am I ready to accept them, am I ready to accept the person holistically? Not just this ideal picture in my head, but the whole person, with all their flaws, and live with this for a long time and happily for the rest of our lives?"
Irina (MidgasKaus): To do this, it is necessary to develop one's Love, because, in fact, it is not sent from heaven by God itself. Only its seed is sent, but growing that seed is the task of the person themselves. And this happens in any case through periods of crisis and spiritual growth, what we call "non-acceptance" – that is the reaction to what does not suit us. When we start working on this within ourselves – with a feeling of Love and gratitude, we transform these emotions, and we develop Love for an imperfect person. But this, first and foremost, must come through Love for oneself and through Love for God as well.
54:55 Example from life. The first year of marriage.
Irina (MidgasKaus): Now I will give an example from life (I have studied such things). I will give such an example. For instance, a woman fell in love with a man. What exactly did she fall in love with?
Victoria: Do I need to come up with it myself, or what?
Irina (MidgasKaus): Let's put it this way: she fell in love with a man, and he was attentive to her, he was handsome, he was well-groomed, he was rich – all these qualities that are in her ideal.
Victoria: And she wanted to get married.
Irina (MidgasKaus): Yes, she fell in love with him. She feels that he is the one she needs. And she found reciprocation – he also fell in love with her. And together they formed a pair. What is a pair? A pair is no longer just two separate individuals, but they form a kind of common field. This field is called "family." And regardless of whether the marriage is formalized or not, there is their common infatuation, this initial stage, a form of Love.
There are different types of Love. Between spouses, there is a form of Love called "conjugal Love." And infatuation is the first stage of conjugal Love. This is more like the unity of two personalities who build a family and give birth to and raise children. And here the manifestation of Love is impossible without compromises and without some concessions on one's own part, which many call sacrifices. There is even such an opinion that conjugal Love is sacrificial. In what way is it sacrificial? In that you give up some of your interests and your activities, hobbies for the sake of a common cause.
So, for example, a woman fell in love with a man, and he reciprocated, they started a family. And then she begins to notice that not all of his behavior matches her ideal. That is, the positive qualities haven't gone anywhere, but negative ones have been added. For example, in her family, it was customary (she was raised that way) for each person to put their things in their place. But he leaves everything lying around, leaves the toothpaste open, doesn't flush the toilet, that is, he behaves in a way that violates her ideas of correct behavior. During the infatuation period, these were trifles for her, she didn't pay attention to them. But now that period has passed, because the energy of infatuation must either end with their separation, or it must grow into Love.
When people start living together – not just dating, but living – this stage lasts about a year. That is, they begin to show each other their habits, their behavior, which was inherent to them before they met. And then, in the heart of this woman, a struggle, so to speak, arises: she likes this man for his qualities, she continues to feel Love for him, but at the same time, his habits irritate her.
And then the fate of this family, this union of people, depends on how this woman behaves – whether she will work on herself, on her anger, on her non-acceptance. And whether she will not just clean up after her husband, but gently instill in him, by her own example, a love for cleanliness and order, simply showing that it's elementary more convenient, that it's elementary more comfortable. Or she will harshly try to change her spouse, criticize him, and get into arguments with him, and thereby cause him to have his ideals of how a woman should be soft, gentle, and accommodating violated. And then he will either work on his ideals or not. This is what this family depends on.
(Irina) How do you like that answer?
Victoria: Let's just say: it's quite comprehensive.
1:00:25 If one of the spouses does not want to change.
Victoria: But, Mid, tell me, what if, let's say, one person is working on themselves, but the other categorically does not want to change. Such a thing can also happen, right?
Irina (MidgasKaus): Of course.
Victoria: What to do then?
Irina (MidgasKaus): In that case, the one who is working on themselves needs to decide whether they are ready to accept this situation as it is, or not ready, and act based on their decision. It is impossible to force a person to change against their will, this must be acknowledged. Then they need to take responsibility for their decision.
So, if I decide to continue living with them, to exist, then I take responsibility for my decision and no longer try to change my spouse. I have taken responsibility that they will be as they are, and will only change if they themselves want to. And I no longer suggest it to them until they ask for it themselves. Or I understand that I cannot accept such a situation, honestly admit it, and then just as honestly tell them that we need to go our separate ways and each build the reality they desire.
Because there are different situations. Sometimes it's just some misunderstanding in daily life. For example, one maintains cleanliness, the other doesn't; one loves to cook, the other doesn't. That is, some everyday things. And there are things related to religion, to worldview. For example, she says, "We will go to church," and he says, "You should go to the mosque." These are different situations, and accepting something unacceptable for oneself and suppressing oneself is also wrong, it's also a lack of self-Love.
And trying to change another person without their desire is a lack of love for them. And here you need to honestly ask yourself, "Am I ready to accept this or not?" If not, then leave. And if you are ready, then take responsibility and continue to live with it.
Victoria: What a profound broadcast we're having today, Mid!
Irina: He says, "Did I answer clearly?"
Victoria: Yes, very clearly.
Irina (MidgasKaus): Or another example: a man got together with a woman and sees that she doesn't take care of the house at all, doesn't clean, doesn't cook, that is, it's not interesting to her at all. He tells her, and in the end she says, "I don't need this. Well, I don't like this kind of thing." He clearly understands that she doesn't want to change. Next, he needs to make a decision: either he takes on these responsibilities himself and doesn't suggest anything else to her, or he breaks up with her. You will agree that taking on such responsibilities is still a certain level of responsibility for him, right?
Victoria: Well, of course, yes.
1:03:41 How to overcome other disagreements between spouses.
Irina (MidgasKaus): Or, for example, disagreements arise when children come along, regarding raising children. By the way, when I talk about the sacrificial nature of conjugal Love, it is most often related to children. For example, a mother stays with a small child. You don't have bio-robots on Earth to do such housework, even despite having children.
Victoria: No, unfortunately.
Irina (MidgasKaus): And it happens that this mother didn't manage to do something, fell asleep, lay down to rest with the child. She is tired, as the child was crying, and she fell asleep with him and didn't have time, for example, to cook dinner, or take out the trash, or something else. The husband comes home from work also tired and starts a scandal, instead of helping his wife cook something simple that doesn't require much effort.
He says, "You are obliged, you are my wife, and despite the child, you must provide these services for me because I bring in the salary." This is already called "non-love." That is, he did not put himself in her position; there is no sacrifice here, no conjugal Love. He simply perceives her as hired personnel to whom he pays a salary. Simply put, as a servant who will serve his interests. But he does not consider that this is his wife, his "other half," who may be in pain, who may be tired, who may not be in a state to cook dinner at all.
If the husband considers this, he will silently sacrifice his rest (because she was still looking after his child too) and not only cook for himself, but also for her, gently call her to the table, hug her and say, "I am always with you!"
What do you feel?
Victoria: I feel that this would be very good. I think many women with small children would like such treatment. Because during this period...
Irina (MidgasKaus): What would the woman feel?
Victoria: Gratitude, respect, Love.
Irina (MidgasKaus): That is, she would feel an intensification of her Love?
Victoria: Yes, of course.
Irina (MidgasKaus): And if she was scolded and reproached, what would she feel?
Victoria: Then, maybe she would cook dinner, but not out of Love, but out of fear. And, of course, there would be discontent, irritation, distance.
Irina (MidgasKaus): And still irritation would accumulate.
Victoria: Yes, yes.
Irina: Well, how do you like that answer?
Victoria: Excellent, a good answer. I hope that the male viewers will draw some conclusions, as will women, equally. Everyone will take responsibility for their own state and not shift it onto the other person.
1:07:02 The main thing is to talk and decide everything together.
Irina (MidgasKaus): Yes, and here it is necessary to understand that there are the interests of the family, and there are the interests of other people. And if a person often neglects the interests of the family for the sake of other people's interests, then they do not value this family. But in any case, everything must be decided together.
For example (let's take the wife now), the husband's mother lives separately, and, say, she needs help around the house. And the husband asked his wife, says, "I'm going to go clean up at my mother's, something is wrong with her health, and I want to help her. And I ask you to help me with this, because after all, she is my mother, who gave birth to me, your loved one." And she says, "I don't need that, I'd rather go to my friend's." That is, it is both the husband's right and the wife's right, but here she chose another interest. And this may cause him to feel that she neglects the interests of the family. And she may feel that her freedom is being restricted and that she is being forced to work for this mother, who might be a completely unpleasant person to her.
Victoria: And what to do?
Irina (MidgasKaus): To get out of this situation, both need to show conjugal Love. That is, he can, of course, ask his wife about it, but not insist if she doesn't want to. And she needs to think, "What is more important for me, meeting with a friend or helping his mother as a manifestation of Love?" That is, here they both need to turn to themselves and to their Higher Self and figure out this issue.
But I would also like to say that in any case, the main thing in a family is to talk, not to remain silent, not to hush up problems, but to approach calmly, without anger, as I already said, calm down. Say, "I have a serious talk to have," and calmly explain, without reproaching the person, but talking about what you see. For example, "I see that you are ignoring my interests, you are ignoring some of my actions. I see that it is also hard for you to accept this. Let's talk about it. How do you see this situation?" Listen to them, speak yourself, and together find a compromise.
(Irina) What do you say?
Victoria: That is very good advice. That's what you need to do.
1:10:31 Jealousy and working with it. Trust as part of Love.
Irina (MidgasKaus): Is there another situation?
Victoria: Yes, let's take... This is probably also a common problem – jealousy, the feeling of jealousy. How can a partner cope with it? In general, does this happen with you? Do you have the feeling of jealousy?
Irina (MidgasKaus): No, we don't have such a feeling. Well, not that it doesn't exist? It very rarely manifests. Jealousy is also self-doubt, and on this basis, distrust of the partner.
Victoria: But if a person realizes that they have it, and they want to work on it, what should they do?
Irina (MidgasKaus): Work on themselves.
Victoria: Work on yourself, yes, it's clear, not lock the partner in a cage.
Irina (MidgasKaus): Acknowledge that this jealousy exists, ask your Higher Self. That is, go to your Higher Self, ask what the root cause of its occurrence is, when it arose – it could be in childhood, in general – and work with that cause.
Let's give an example. For example, someone in the family is jealous of their husband or wife, and asks their Higher Self, "What is the root cause of this jealousy?" And a specific situation will come to mind for the person. And they will look at that situation, and if there is some resentment, disappointment, they will forgive that person, transform the energies of resentment, and then transform the energies of jealousy. Here it goes through a general practice of dissolving blocks and transforming energy.
And also let them mentally talk to their partner, tell them that they trust them, and that it is precisely the partner's decision how to behave. And if they decide to cheat, one must accept it like this, "If my partner decides to cheat on me in secret, I might not find out about it in any case. Therefore, I choose to trust my partner. And if I cannot choose trust, then I will admit it to myself, and we will simply separate. Because I admit that I do not feel conjugal Love for this person and cannot entrust myself, my life, to them."
Victoria: Aha! So it turns out that trust is also part of conjugal Love, otherwise it would simply be tormenting each other.
Irina (MidgasKaus): Yes. If there is no trust between spouses, then there cannot be Love between them either.
Victoria: So, this is also a signal: if this trust is missing, then one should think about what kind of relationship it really is?
Irina (MidgasKaus): If there is no trust, one must first work on oneself, find out why it is absent (perhaps due to some negative past experience), and eliminate that cause. And if trust still does not appear, and there is no desire to even develop it... And developing it is to tell oneself, "I trust God, I trust myself."
1:13:53 The relationship between thoughts and feelings. Mental attitudes.
Irina (MidgasKaus): We cannot develop feelings within ourselves without our thoughts. If we do not speak them, we will not develop them. Because our thoughts give rise to feelings within us, just as feelings give rise to thoughts within us.
Victoria: Oh, how interesting! So, let's develop this thought. Wait a moment... To evoke feelings, you need to speak thoughts, did I understand correctly?
Irina (MidgasKaus): Yes, attitudes – these are thoughts, these are mental attitudes. For example, I feel distrust towards my wife. If I am a man who feels distrust towards his wife, I constantly have thoughts that she will cheat on me in my absence. I start working on myself. How would I personally feel with these thoughts? I would imagine that my wife is cheating on me, and I am observing it from the outside, and I would ask myself, "What do I feel?"
Let's do it this way: have you ever felt jealousy?
Victoria: Well, of course, yes.
Irina (MidgasKaus): So, now imagine that...
Victoria: I'm having personal therapy today! Okay.
Irina (MidgasKaus): Imagine that your husband is cheating on you, and you are standing nearby watching. What do you feel?
Victoria: Well, anger.
Irina (MidgasKaus): See, you feel anger, and then you ask yourself, "How does what is happening now concern me?"
Victoria: How does it concern me?... Well, I don't know, the first thought that came was – just turn around, leave, and not look, because it doesn't concern me.
Irina (MidgasKaus): No, "how does his choice concern me?" – let's ask it that way. This choice of his.
Victoria: How does it concern me?... Directly then, it turns out it does. It's a threat to our relationship.
Irina (MidgasKaus): It's a threat to your relationship. And for what reason might he make such a choice?
Victoria: This is because, apparently, not everything is good in the relationship. I think if everything is good in a relationship, there will be no infidelity.
Irina (MidgasKaus): Good. Next ask, "And why should I waste energy on suspecting something I cannot verify?"
Victoria: Yes, it's pointless to do that.
Irina (MidgasKaus): Good. Next we ask, "And why should I stay next to a person I suspect of not loving me?"
Victoria: But that's thinking like that every time, to torment myself! Why torment myself like that, I don't know?
Irina (MidgasKaus): So. "And why do I need to torment myself?"
Victoria: For some reason, thoughts come that somewhere... Okay. Probably, there was such a situation in childhood where I experienced these feelings, and for some reason I keep returning to them. It's important for me to experience them again and again.
Irina (MidgasKaus): Next ask, "So, I return to them to change the initial attitude that arose in childhood?"
Victoria: It turns out so.
Irina (MidgasKaus): "So, my Higher Self returns me to them so that I pay attention?"
Victoria: Yes.
Irina (MidgasKaus): Then let's thank the Higher Self for doing this.
(Irina) What do you feel?
Victoria: I feel that it's important, that all the circumstances that arise in our lives are for our spiritual growth.
Irina (MidgasKaus): You're already halfway there, you've already done half the work.
And then you look at that initial situation in childhood, what happened there, and you dissolve those feelings that arose there through transformation, and you say attitudes to yourself that you trust the world, trust God, trust yourself, and trust the people who are with you. Most often, such attitudes arise when significant expectations were betrayed in childhood. That is, the foundation crumbles, the security of the world, and the person begins to perceive the world distortedly – that "the one who is next to me can hurt me."
1:19:03 The block of resentment towards an alcoholic father.
Victoria: By the way, you know, this often happens with alcoholism. People come and say, "My husband suffers from alcoholism. And my father and mother lived like that, and why do I constantly end up in such relationships?" So it turns out that the person has some kind of internal block that simply attracts such relationships into their life? That is, it's important for them to live through this again and again until they understand the cause and work through it.
Irina (MidgasKaus): Until this woman works through her resentment, anger towards her father, the desire to rid him of alcoholism without his desire, this desire will attract meetings into her field with people who have similar problems, in order to work on them. She will, so to speak, repeat the life scenario that was with her father, but now in relation to her husband.
Then she was a little girl and couldn't change anything. And now she is an adult woman and will try to do this with an adult man. That is, to take the place of her mother, as she used to take her place when her drunk father offended her. She mentally entered into her, inhabited her, and tried to understand how she would act in her place. And now the girl has grown up and indeed found herself in that place. But to break this scenario, you need to work on the perception of the father.
Victoria: So, the way out of any life scenarios is only possible through working on oneself?
Irina (MidgasKaus): Yes.
(Irina) So, well, we've been discussing for a long time.
Victoria: Yes, we won't even move on to other blocks now.
Irina: No, let's, we will still have a topic specifically on "Family Relations."
Victoria: Yes? Great.
Irina: Because there were other topics. Let's rather have you sign up with me and ask about other topics later.
Victoria: Yes, I think if we get feedback from the viewers, if they are interested, we will continue this series of conversations. Specifically analyzing life situations.
1:21:09 A series on family relations in the Club and "Irina Podzorova Academy."
Irina: Dear friends, I also want to start covering a series on family relationships, either in my Club or in the "Academy."
Yes, indeed, I want to say that as a contactee... I myself do not have a family, I am divorced. But I will not be speaking from myself, but from my curators, who do have families. That is, I can convey information about this. And my own experience, of course, is my experience. And I will say for sure that engaging in esotericism on a professional basis, on the basis of constant work, is very difficult to combine with family life.
Victoria: Yes.
Irina: No, it is, of course, possible, but, again, as MidgasKaus already said, only if the other side desires it. If the other side does not want this, you will still separate. He is saying now, "Yes, divorce does not at all show that it was you who failed to keep the family – it can be for various reasons, including the reason that the other person, the other side, decided to build their life differently. That is their right." Yes, indeed, I did not make the decision to divorce, it was the decision of the other side.
1:22:50 Conclusion. Thanks.
Irina: So, dear friends, I thank you for watching this video. I hope you now understand better how MidgasKaus would act in certain situations. We even asked him: if he suddenly felt jealousy towards his wife, he would start to figure out within himself where it came from.
I wish you, dear friends, family harmony and well-being for you and your children, as well as the ability to always come to an agreement and find a compromise. This is truly a special wisdom that develops not only from watching videos and reading books, but from your own experience.
So, dear friends, I thank you for watching this video. I thank MidgasKaus for his answers. I thank Victoria for her interesting questions. And see you all next time!
1:24:31 End of video.
December 9, 2025
Conference participants:
Irina Podzorova – contactee with extraterrestrial civilizations, with fine-material civilizations, and with the Spiritual world;
Victoria Timashyova – meditation master, attunement master with the Higher Self, psychologist, energy practitioner, conductor of fine-material energies of the "Cassiopaea" project;
MidgasKaus – representative of the planet Esler, biologist, psychologist, microbiologist, specialist in extraterrestrial life forms.
